While I do not suppose to speak for all Enneagram 9’s, this Nine has few favorites. I noticed it a few years ago as lists floated around Facebook, encouraging you and your followers to list favorite candy, or color, car or cartoon. I avoided those lists because I felt slightly inept at not being able to answer all the questions. No, I have no favorite food, I like Mexican food, but stop short of calling it a favorite. Because, subconsciously, I think I knew that if you pick a favorite, it could cause controversy. No thank you says my Nine self. BUT, I love October, and yes, it is my favorite.
Why so serious?
It’s possible it landed in my top spot because it’s the month of my birth, true. And I’ve also noticed in the three days that have passed since the 1st that I feel a little bit spunky, maybe even a little bit Alexis (knowingly shaking my shoulders to my fellow Schitt’s Creek fans). Fitting because the Wholehearted Living Guidepost I’m focusing on this month is:
Cultivating Laughter, Song, and Dance.
And Letting Go of Cool and Always in Control
If there was something more opposite than me, this guidepost would be it. Ten thousand percent not joking. I’ve been told I’m too serious, but I come by it honestly. Responsibility at a young age will do that to you. By the age of four I knew my way around the inside of a hospital and was asking to take over the care of babies. True story. I was in the hospital for months but not in a contagious way so I could play with and hold babies. By fifth grade, I tried to take over cleaning my brother’s room because it was full of filth and pestilence. He didn’t even try to stop me. Who was smarter? On second thought…
It’s ok to play
But that feeling of spunky and feisty has started poking at me. Chipping away at the edges of the responsible outer shell. In the middle of work the other day, not 100% out of place, but out of character, I broke into a Benedictine Monk hymn singing voice to accentuate a point…on a call with about ten other people. Momentarily taken over by silly and not sure where it even came from. And I lived.
In Brené Brown’s Unlocking Us Podcast, she spoke about play being unstructured time spent with no purpose and described what is play for her family. That’s incredibly difficult as I feel like play doesn’t come naturally. But, it did make me think about what is play for me. The ‘time spent with no purpose’ kept tripping me up. And maybe that’s mindset. When I think about writing, for example, I love to sit down and put the wandering of my mind onto the paper…but I’ve made it include a purpose, which is to put out this blog. Or when I ride my bike, it’s not only for fitness, but also for the joy of being outside, which brings me energy and closer to God. So that ‘purpose’ continues to get attached. Is it possible I think too much?
Back to October
Perhaps this, my favorite month, even in what has been a nutsville year, is an invitation to explore a different side of Wholehearted Living. Release the white knuckled grip on responsibility aka control and spend time with no purpose. October is the tipping point month between the sweltering heat of summer and the chill in the air. It’s the transition of leaves turning and falling, making room for new growth after a long hibernation. A time when you can wear sweaters, but don’t always have to…and can almost enjoy a hot cup of tea without it triggering a hot flash. Almost being the operative word.
October is a reminder that I was a little girl once, and that little girl remains inside of me. She would celebrate all month with streamers and cupcakes and play, not worrying about responsibility, but instead instigating laughter. And so, the noise that is the world around us can fade this month (I know I’m not alone in desiring that dream to be a reality). Even if this is not the month of your birth, how can you give yourself permission to spend time without purpose? It’s not as lofty of a goal as it sounds. I come back to the idea that it’s mindset…it’s one thing at a time…it’s intentionality…and it’s possible for you and possible for me. Go play, my friends. Be Brave. Lisa